i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger