just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
