sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
time to smoke my breakfast
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I don't deserve a penis
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
