Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(802): View more from Vermont

clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.

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(214): View more from Texas

don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"

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(410): View more from Maryland

pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...

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(908): View more from New Jersey

it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(203): View more from Connecticut

im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning

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(310): View more from California

Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?

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(585): View more from New York

I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out

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(914): View more from New York

Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.

(917): View more from New York City

So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?

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(951): View more from California

ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP

(1-951): View more from California

Have fun and good luck.

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