Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings" http://tfl.nu/7jzd
  Replies (29) Good night (2968) Bad night (550)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere http://tfl.nu/ftm6
  Replies (10) Good night (618) Bad night (3358)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  Life is so much better after having sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): Life is so much better after having sex. http://tfl.nu/blju
  Replies (39) Good night (11217) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century. http://tfl.nu/yuyb
  Replies (14) Good night (3974) Bad night (685)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone? http://tfl.nu/fjjr
  Replies (10) Good night (3501) Bad night (851)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls. http://tfl.nu/rbr1
  Replies (13) Good night (3836) Bad night (1419)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout http://tfl.nu/4dgw
  Replies (9) Good night (1763) Bad night (731)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it? http://tfl.nu/27yi
  Replies (5) Good night (1334) Bad night (636)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  So stoned i forgot i was in bed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): So stoned i forgot i was in bed http://tfl.nu/69t5
  Replies (1) Good night (931) Bad night (365)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing

  (1-619): View more from California

  Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this

  (619): View more from California

  ...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing (1-619): Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this (619): ...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down... http://tfl.nu/uvgk
  Replies (4) Good night (1141) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe. http://tfl.nu/ot23
  Replies (2) Good night (842) Bad night (265)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it. http://tfl.nu/38tv
  Replies (1) Good night (696) Bad night (234)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear. http://tfl.nu/ufbe
  Replies (1) Good night (580) Bad night (264)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed. http://tfl.nu/y3pb
  Replies (9) Good night (255) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash http://tfl.nu/b2o7
  Replies (0) Good night (545) Bad night (240)

Randomize