Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
