If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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