He kissed a someone with a penis
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
you inspire me to be a worse person
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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