Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
You have to summon your inner elephant
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.