If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
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