The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
