Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize