how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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