What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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