We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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