Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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