My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
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