So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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