i need an iv and a liver transplant
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
zippers are such a cool invention
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
So squirting runs in the family.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Randomize
