the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
