she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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