Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
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The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
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Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
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