why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
