he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize