I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
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