when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
