Dual....:-)
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
