oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Dicks are not precious.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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