Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
