i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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