You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
