i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Randomize
