i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Randomize
