I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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