Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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