This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
