her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
