so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
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