Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
You can't motorboat a personality
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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