I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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