We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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