I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Randomize
