Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize