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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Adam has been drinking

  (1-810): View more from Michigan

  Who has his phone

  (810): View more from Michigan

  Adam does

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you

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• 

  27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (417): View more from Missouri

  Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...

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• (925): View more from California

  it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?

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• 

  These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.

  (210): View more from Texas

  100%

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.

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• (914): View more from New York

  I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?

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• (415): View more from California

  I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.

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• (507): View more from Minnesota

  Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.

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• (818): View more from California

  Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation

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