Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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