I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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