I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize