he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
