Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
