It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Randomize