Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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