Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
