Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
should my penis look like a turkey
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Randomize
